Thursday, February 22

Love Thursday - me...


Even with the best intentions life sometimes gets a little bit out of hand; focus is lost, mindfulness goes out the window… and that’s what’s been happening to me lately. At first this change in attitude was almost imperceptible, but very gradually I started noticing how my priorities had changed, and yesterday I suddenly found myself in the middle of a really bad patch, feeling generally miserable about anything and everything, but particularly about me.

I haven’t been looking after myself: not my mind, not my body (and it’s not all down to the semla). It’s like I don’t care about me, about how I feel. It’s as if I have just forgotten about my self, and so gradually I’ve been feeling worse and worse.

Last night it all came to a head, I slouched on the sofa all night, watched a useless film on TV that left me feeling almost brain dead. And afterwards I beat myself up because I’d let another evening pass just like that, in a near vegetative state. I went to bed in a lousy mood, skipped the evening pilates, didn’t even bother to wash my face. Why do I do this to myself when I know how lousy it makes me feel? I know what I need to do to feel better, and yet I feel compelled to do the exact opposite, to make myself feel worse.

And so today I have decided to take a day off work and I’m going to spend it mindfully. I’m going to do yoga/pilates, I’m going to meditate, I’m going for a long walk, I’m going to put on some silly music and dance around the flat, I’m going to write, I’m going to eat simple food and maybe towards the end of the day I’ll meet up with a friend I haven’t seen for quite some time. This Love Thursday is about me, about loving me again…

Photo by Ron

18 comments:

Edvard Moonke said...

Quite right too, and by tomorrow hopefully you'll be back to feeling great again!

I know what you mean, though. I'm the guy who dotted the 'i's and crossed the 't's in PROCRASTINATION, and it doesn't make me feel great either. Yet, the more I procrastinate and vegetate, the less I want do anything about it. It's a vicious circle and requires immediate ACTION!

Lacithecat said...

You know, I have never even contemplated such a day? I think wonderful and am mystified why I have never been so nice to myself. I hope following your heart today leads you to a better place.

And I think I will try the same soon.

Tabitha said...

I'm glad that you are taking time (mindfully) for yourself. I hope it is a great day, that turns into a great week, that turns into a great month etc.

When I feel down, I tend to do things that make me feel more unhappy (like. . .ummm. . .nothing). This throws me (or maybe I walk into) a downward spiral. The best thing seems to be mindfully doing things for myself.

It sounds like you are on the right track. I hope you feel rejuvenated.

Happy Love Thursday!

La Cubana Gringa said...

Sometimes when I feel kind of blah, I find a swingset in a playground, and swing. It was always one of those things that I loved doing as a kid. Cheers me up a bit as an adult. Resets the fun receptors.

And, I find that yelling "yipppeeeeeee!!!!!" and "woooohooooo!!" while doing fun things helps as well. :) Try it!

Hope you're enjoying your day! xoxo

Sharon said...

That Gringa has the right idea. I find that down days let us rest up for those special days ahead. Methinks you are waaaaaay to hard on yourself. Since I am mucho older than you take this advice. Don't let those down days go beyond 24 hours but in that time you are allowed a *pity* party of your choice...quiet or loud. I am a believer in getting the thing dealt with and done with. You are loved by so many on your blog listing.
XOXOXOX right at you!

My Marrakech said...

sounds great. and I am sending you some extra love from Marrkech to sprinkle in your coffee and a spare pinch to store in your pocket, in case you need it:-)

Gypsy Purple said...

I`ll meet you halfway on the walk and just wordlessly walk with you..next to you, for I need this walk as well....I need the dance as well.....

meredith said...

Thanks for sharing today. Taking care of and loving one's self is so important and many of us out here tend to forget that. I hope you had a good day and Happy Love Thursday.

Waspgoddess said...

Thank you Moonke, Laci, Tabitha, La CG, Sharon, Maryam, Chamara, Meredith, thank you all for leaving such kind and thoughtful messages, it was such a nice surprise, never did I think I would feel so cared for by people I have never even met...

I have had an amazing day, not only did I do most of the things I set out to do, I ended up getting quite a radical haircut as well, I thought it was time to celebrate the mushroom head in earnest :)

And now I feel ready to take on the world again, I feel rested and my enthusiasm for life has returned.

Vanessa said...

I'm so glad to hear that showering yourself with some love has paid off! You rock. Thanks for the comment you left on my blog... it helped :)
You've got to post a pic of your new hairdo soon!
Vx

Cakes said...

atta girl!
Sounds like a lovely day! How's it going so far?

paris parfait said...

We all have days like you describe - the important thing is that you've made up for it today, being good to yourself! Easier said than done, with everything that keeps us busy. It's like the Greeks, with a day of indulgence followed by a day of moderation (unlike the Romans, who were always running around wearing themselves out with too many mysteries). :)

Nicole said...

so glad you had an amazing day. sometimes we just need those days. oddly, i love to to get my hair cut when i'm feeling down too. i can't wait to see it!

Buttercup said...

I could have written that post many times during the past few months. My favorite part is where you say that you are going to spend the next day "mindfully." I'm going to think about approaching things like that to. Are you also a Swede? I love fastlagsbullar but I haven't had one yet this year. Yum!!!! (Although I just had a piece of key lime pie so really I can't believe I'm contemplating eating more sweets. Yikes. I need to remember the mindful thing.) Don't be too hard on yourself. Sometimes being mindless is ok, but I know what you mean about it making you feel lousy.

Caz said...

You described in perfect wording how I often feel but can never convey. Brilliant! I recently came up with a strategy of compiling lists and ensuring that all the points were met before I went to bed. So far so good. Keep it up!

sognatrice said...

I hope you had a wonderful, mindful Love Thursday! We all need those days every now and again, but many of us don't recognize or understand the need, and we're the worse for it. I, too, am excited to hear more about this haircut...will you be mistaken for Britney Spears now?!

Tammy said...

That was a great idea!

Bex said...

I'm sorry you were down...but it seems that you're feeling better today! :) It's a great idea to put a day aside every once in a while for yourself!